A well-known marriage therapist, Shamseddin Giwa, has taken to his Facebook page to advise women on key red flags to watch out for in men before committing to marriage.
According to him, certain behaviors and attitudes displayed by men should serve as warning signs for women, as they could indicate potential control issues, lack of stability, or an unwillingness to support their partner’s personal growth and independence.
Giwa emphasized that one of the most concerning red flags is when a man insists that a woman must get pregnant before he proposes, implying that marriage is only conditional upon her fertility. He further outlined several other warning signs that women should take seriously when evaluating a potential partner.
Below is the list of red flags he shared:
– “You must get pregnant before I propose.”
– “You cannot work; you’ll be a full-time housewife.”
– “I’m not sure where this is going yet, but let’s see how it goes.”
– “When we marry, you will break your SIM card and change your number.”
– “We must live in the family house.”
– “Stop your education for now; when I marry you, you can continue.”
– “I don’t have anything doing for now.”
– “My mummy said…” (when he constantly relies on his mother’s opinions for every decision).
– “There’s no need for details; let’s just do it.”
His post has sparked discussions online, with many women expressing their concerns about encountering such behaviors in relationships. Some commenters agreed with his advice, stating that these attitudes often lead to controlling and unhealthy marriages. Others debated the list, with some men arguing that certain conditions, such as living in a family house, might be practical depending on the circumstances.
However, Giwa stood by his advice, urging women to prioritize their emotional, financial, and mental well-being before saying ‘I do.’ He emphasized that true love and partnership should be based on mutual respect, support, and shared goals rather than control or coercion.
See the post below:
